Tiffanie DeBartolo: Amazing Grace & Rock 'n Roll

Finding Tiffanie DeBartolo's GOD-SHAPED HOLE will probably always be one of my favorite literary finds. That may a bit grandiose to say but it's how I honestly feel about the stories and characters that came to life in this funny, lyrical, tragic, romantic, lyrical, honest, heart-breaking and magical book. What seems to be a simple "girl meets boy" story left me feeling both devastated and hungry to fully embrace life in all its insanity, humor and grace.

Tiffanie DeBartolo was one of a few people whose work inspired my desire to do this interview series so I am incredibly grateful that she took time out from her insanely busy schedule to answer a few questions.

---

Can you tell me about a bit about your upbringing and background?

Sure. I was born and raised in a small town in Ohio called Youngstown. It was the kind of place Bruce Springsteen would write a song about. Wait, he did write a song about it. Youngstown was a big steel town at one point, but it fell into a decline in the 70's, so it was kind of a depressed place to grow up. I remember it being very gray, and there was little to do as an adolescent beyond local high school football games or hanging out at the mall, neither of which appealed to me, so I spent the majority of my time in my room reading books, listening to music, and watching MTV. Luckily my dad traveled a lot for work, and very often he would take the whole family with hmi--my mom, my two sisters, and me--so I got to visit a lot of different places, which definitely shaped who I became, and fueled all my restless dreams. 

How did the did the original idea of God-Shaped Hole come to you and how long did it take you to get from that original inspiration to finished book?

The idea came to me after Jeff Buckley died. GRACE was one of the most influential CDs I'd ever encountered, I was inconsolable over Jeff's death, and I needed a place to put all that grief. For me, writing has always been my outlet for pain. It's also where I explore the existential questions of life and death. The book isn't about Jeff, obviously, as I never knew him. It's more like a literary response to his music. A fictional story inspired by the spirit I found in his songs. I began writing the book with that intention, anyway, and I finished it nine months later, almost to the day.


At the beginning of GOD-SHAPED HOLE Jacob and Beatrice buy each other a record that they think reflect their perceptions of each other. What album do you think would best describe you?

TD: Wow, that's a really great question. It's a hard one, too. There are three or four that come to mind, but if I must narrow it down to one, I have to go with U2's ACHTUNG BABY, reason being that, to me, ACHTUNG BABY is a record about struggling with demons, about the frailty of humanity, about love and all its contradictions, and the internal and external conflicts that cause love to thrive, or that tear it apart. It's about how despairing love can be, and also about how love is the only thing that can rescue us. It's beauty and truth; it's a divine, gorgeous mess. It's life being lived moment by moment. It's everything I believe in. And the idea that we are all complicated creatures fighting every day to be the best we can be, to hold on to love, to hold on to dignity, to be authentic, and to not allow ourselves to drown in our confusion, these are the themes and issues I wrestle with in my life, and, as a result, in my writing. I can't think of a better record that sums up who I am.

It's been said that most first time novelist pull a lot of the story from their real life. How true is that with God-Shaped Hole? And how much are you willing to elaborate on the truths within the fiction?

Well, I think that on some level, all authors put pieces of themselves and much of their experiences into their work, at least all the authors that I love. Every human being on the planet sees the world with a unique viewpoint, and I think any author would be doing a disservice to the reader if they didn't share that viewpoint. That's what makes an author's voice so powerful. It's perspective. And I would be fooling myself if I said I didn't have a pretty specific perspective, or that there wasn't very significant parts of me in my characters, but one of the real tricks in writing is having all of one's emotional truths and quirks on hand, and then letting go of them, at least consciously, when you write. In other words, I dont sit down and say, “Okay, Eliza is going to have these traits of mine, and Beatrice is going to be like me in the following ways.” It just happens. I may have already said this, but for me, writing is very often an exercise in exploration, an attempt to answer a question or to solve a problem, and naturally, if one is thinking about these things and obsessing over them on a daily basis, they are going to be evident in the work.

I know you also wrote and directed Dream for an Insomniac. What inspired you to pursue a career as a novelist instead of continuing on the Hollywood path?

Well, in my opinion, Hollywood is more than just a place; it's a way of life. And it was a life I really didn't want to lead. I value my privacy, and the solitude of writing. Making films necessitates a lot of schmoozing and game playing and socializing that I just didn't have in me. That said, I really did love the experience of being on the set, and watching my words and my vision come to life. If I could still do that, and not have to deal with any “suits”, I would. But, alas ....

I seems that GOD-SHAPED HOLE would make such a beautiful and lyrical film but it's my understanding that you won't let that happen. Why is that?

That's not entirely true. I actually think both of my books would make great films, I'm just really picky about who could step into the shoes of certain characters, mainly Jacob and Paul. If I could be involved to the degree that I got say-so in the casting, as well as the script, I'm all for it. If anyone reading this knows Ryan Gosling, tell him I've got the perfect role for him. =)
Beatrice is driving away from Los Angeles at the end of GOD-SHAPED HOLE. Where do you imagine she is today and what is she doing?

TD: Well, that question is actually answered in (Tiffanie's second novel) HOW TO KILL A ROCK STAR. She makes a cameo very near the end of the book. That's all I'm going to say.

What is your process as a writer? Are you disciplined and focused or random and manic?

I'm disciplined and focused to an almost annoying degree. I've actually been striving in the last couple years to loosen the reins a bit. Last summer I realized that I'd been writing virtually nonstop for over a decade, and I took most of the last year off from writing to recharge. In the meantime I did charity work for an organization I work with called Road Recovery, and I started an indie record label, which has been amazingly fun and rewarding, a real learning experience, but a lot more work than I ever imagined. I've also been traveling like crazy. I'm just coming back to writing now, and it feels good after being away for so long.

As for my process when I'm in writing mode, I have a pretty particular schedule--my dogs wake me up early, usually about 6:30, I have coffee, then I go for a run or hike or a bike ride. It's imperative to my well-being that I do some sort of physical activity every morning. Then I'm usually at my desk by nine, and I write until four, or, if it's a really good day, until my eyes get blurry and I can't see anymore.

Of the fictitious characters you've created, who would you most like to meet as a real person?

Ha, that's another great question. Is it a cop-out to say that on some level I feel like I've met them all already, through the real-life characters that have inspired them? Not acceptable? Okay, then I think I'd have to go with Jacob Grace, only because he is the most fictional, in the sense that he wasn't based on anyone I'd ever met, and he was a real inspiration to me. Discovering Jacob taught me a lot about life and how to live it, and I'd be honored to have him in my extraordinary group of friends.

What about your life as a novelist has been the most surprising?

That I get to do it, and that people are actually moved and entertained by my work. I know what it means to be inspired and touched and changed by a book or a song, and to think that I can impart a little of that in someone else is a remarkable gift. Furthermore, if you had asked me at age fourteen what my dream job was, I would have described my current occupation. It's so cool to get to do what you love to do, especially something so creatively satisfying. Not that it isn't a huge challenge at times. It's not a life that allows one to shy away from feelings or experiences, and I don't mean that in a hedonistic way, that's not what I'm about at all. I mean that if you don't exist with a certain amount of awareness, if you aren't participating and paying attention, you end up gypping yourself and your audience of authenticity and knowledge in your work. I recently read an article in Psychology Today that said one of the ways a person can learn to be more authentic in their life is by reading novels. I feel the same way about writing them. You can't fake it, and knowing that keeps me on my toes. I can't waste a lot of time or live in vain without feeling like a loser, but I wouldn't want it any other way.

Are you working on a new book? If so, how much can you tell me about it?

I am. I began this book a few years ago, finished an embarrassingly awful rough draft last summer, then walked away from it for a while. I'm completely rewriting it now, to the point that it will probably be almost unrecognizable to the two people who had the bad luck of reading the original manuscript, but I'm not sure of the hows or the whys of the story yet, so I can't really say much more, except that on some level it's about forgiveness, making amends, and learning how to let go.

What's the last book you read that you loved so much that you simply didn't want it to end?

SHANTARAM by Gregory David Roberts. I also really liked THEN WE CAME TO THE END by Joshua Ferris. I started that on a plane going from London to San Francisco and finished it before we landed. Oh, and THE MOTEL LIFE by Willie Vlautin. Excellent in its simplicity. I strive to write like that.

In the two books you've written, music has played a very important role. What is the importance of music in your own life? And why do you think it is such a universally powerful form of expression?

Music is everything to me, my biggest inspiration, my religion, my salvation. It’s like food. I need it to survive. And I think its power lies in its ability to stir things up, to reach down deep and instigate a reaction. It makes you feel something, and in such an accessible medium. Plus, music allows for complete commiseration. I maintain that there is a song out there to speak to every emotion, every experience, every hope, dream, and fear one can have. And it's impossible to feel completely alone in the world when you put on a great song and know that the person who wrote it, or the person singing it, or playing it, has felt what you're feeling.

What guilty pleasure music do you love that would most surprise people?

My favorite radio station is The Heart on XM radio. It's all sappy cheesy songs from the 70’s and 80’s, and I am kind of proud and kind of embarrassed to admit that I know the words to almost everything they play. =)

You've won a vacation to anywhere in the world. Where would you go, what would you do and what books would you take along?

God, I love these kinds of hypothetical questions. I think my answer would change week to week, depending on my mood, but right now I'm leaning toward Southeast Asia: Cambodia, Laos, Vietnam, Thailand, Myanmar. I love to experience new cultures, new cuisines, new people, and this is a part of the world I have yet to visit. What would I do there? I'm a dork when I travel. I would visit all the temples, churches, museums, little villages, and tourist attractions. Whatever the country had to offer, I would want to see it.

Crap. Can I have a second hypothetical vacation? I also really really really want to go to the Maldives. But this would be a surfing and swiming and have sex on the beach vacation, as opposed to a cultural awakening. =)

And as for books, I'd bring the next three in my “to read” pile, which are, in order of appearance, THE LIME TWIG by John Hawkes, THE GINGER MAN by J.P. Donleavy, and DON QUIXOTE by Cervantes.  

Can you tell me a little bit about the record label you co-own?

I'd love to. It's called Bright Antenna, named after a line in the Rush song “Spirit of the Radio”. It's a song about maintaining integrity in music, which is what the label aims to do. We joke that if rock 'n roll were a pool, it would need a good strong does of chlorine, and Bright Antenna wants to be that chlorine. I am one of four partners, the Chief Executive Super Goddess, if you will. =)

As far as the music we want to put out, if I had to generalize I'd say we lean toward alternative indie rock, but we're certainly open to anything of quality. Our first official release was an EP by a young, extremely talented band from Liverpool, England called The Wombats. They're actually quite popular across the pond, and are just starting to break America now. In the meantime, we're in negotiations with a couple other bands, and have a lot of cool things in the works.

You've worked in the three major storytelling industries--publishing, film, and music--how are they interconnected and what are the pleasures and struggles in each?

I guess because I worked so separately in all three, I don't see them as interconnected. And being that I haven't worked in the film industry for over a decade, that one doesn't seem to apply anymore. Right now the struggle for me is that I essentially have two full-time jobs: I'm a writer, and I'm the CESG of the label, and if I ever want to publish another novel I have to learn how to balance that a little better. The good news is that it's now a tax write-off for me to go to shows, and to wander around to see bands. Not to mention that I'm constantly being sent music, by my partners and by artists and bands, and I often spend a good chunk of my day on MySpace listening to it. I can't really complain about that.

Here, at the end of the interview, what would you like to say to the writer who was staring at a blank piece of paper, desperate to the tell the story that can't seem to find words and fearful that perhaps all the naysayers are correct, so instead this struggling artist is here, reading your story while trying to find the courage to dive back into the unknown?

I would say that, believe it or not, I was staring at that same blank page this morning. And four hours later I had about five hundred words staring back at me. You have to start somewhere. And always write your story pretending that no one is ever going to read it. You can't be a good writer and a self-conscious one. If I thought about who was going to read my words before I published them I'd never put out anything.

I would also like to say that writing is as much about discipline as it is about talent. You can have all the talent in the world, but if you don't sit your ass down and grind it out, you'll never get anywhere. That's my advice in life as well as in writing. Get off your fucking ass and do something. Try to make the world a brighter place. You can be as lazy and useless as you want when you're dead.

---

www.myspace.com/tiffaniedebartolo